The Call Me Maybe Gollum Mashup

By now, you’ve likely heard the Carley Rae Japsen song, Call Me Maybe.

Ok, maybe you’re more like me and didn’t know about the song until a certain cookie loving blue monster made a parody video.

Or, maybe you’ve seen the Olympic swim team singing the song.

Then again, perhaps you heard the "Call Me Lochte" parody.

Yes, it’s been done and parodied multiple times.  After I first saw the Cookie Monster version, though, I got an idea.  You see, I happened to be reading The Hobbit at the time.  Not just that, but I was at a critical juncture in the story.  Bilbo Baggins had found a certain magical ring and won a riddle game against the creature known as Gollum.

Now, my brain has mashed two completely unrelated things before with… um, "interesting" results.  Specifically, Elmer Fudd combined with Cee Lo Green.  So it didn’t take long for the idea to click of having Gollum singing the song "to" Bilbo.  Of course, he wouldn’t be simply asking Bilbo to "call him, maybe."  No, he would be singing for Bilbo to give him the ring.

Unfortunately, like before, I don’t have the skills to produce the video myself.  Even if I could get hold of the instrumental version of Call Me Maybe, I don’t have a Gollum costume handy and my Gollum impersonation is horrid at best.  So, I’ll just have to be satisfied with posting the lyrics.  If anyone wants to turn this into an actual video, please just link up here and let me know.  I’d love to see this come to life.

And so, here’s "Give It To Me" by Gollum.

I have but one wish to tell,
My precious in a cave fell
Your pockets’ contents compel,
Me to now sound your death knell

Traded my soul for one thing,
My precious small golden ring
Now you ask for the way out,
You have Precious no doubt

The riddle contest,
You won, I could not guess
What was in your pockets
Where you think you’re taking Precious?

Hey, I just met you,
I might be crazy,
But you have Precious,
So give it to me!

You cannot be seen,
While you wear it,
You have my Precious,
So give it to me!

Hey, since I met you,
I’m going crazy,
I need my Precious,
So give it to me!

Without it cave goblins,
See and chase me,
Must have my Precious,
So give it to me!

You slipped the ring and then
I could not bash your head in.
I did not see where you went
Must get in your way

I run down tunnels left right,
With my heart full of spite
I have a plan in my mind now
To stay in your way

You said, you weren’t knowin’
The exit which way was goin’
I think lies you’re throwin’
Where you think you’re going, Baggins?

Hey, I just met you,
I might be crazy,
But you have Precious,
So give it to me!

You cannot be seen,
While you wear it,
You have my Precious,
So give it to me!

Hey, since I met you,
I’m going crazy,
I need my Precious,
So give it to me!

Without it cave goblins,
See and chase me,
Must have my Precious,
So give it to me!

I need my Precious in my life
I need it so bad
I want it so bad
My Precious so, so bad

I need my Precious in my life
I need it so bad
Baggins should know that
I want my Precious back

You cannot be seen,
While you wear it,
You have my Precious,
So give it to me!

Hey, since I met you,
I’m going crazy,
I need my Precious,
So give it to me!

Without it cave goblins,
See and chase me,
Must have my Precious,
So give it to me!

I need my Precious in my life
I need it so bad
I want it so bad
My Precious so, so bad

I need my Precious in my life
I need it so bad
Baggins should know that

So give it to me!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Time limit is exhausted. Please reload CAPTCHA.

CommentLuv badge

Comments links could be nofollow free.