My Aloha Friday question for today is: Do you avoid seeing the doctor or taking medicine because you are too busy doing things for other people or to try to save money?

Thanks to Kailani at An Island Life for starting this fun for Friday. Please be sure to head over to her blog to say hello and sign the linky there if you are participating.

Aloha #105

I could swear that I didn’t have these new bites yesterday, but there they are.  Either they were there but I was distracted by other ones, or my area has become infested with ninja mosquitoes.

I imagine the ninja mosquitoes snuck into our room late at night from a gap left by the window air conditioning unit.  Silently, they flew across the room surveying their potential targets.  Then, they zoomed into action.  They attacked my neck, my ear, my arms and my legs.  With their attack completed and their bellies full of TechyDad blood, they crept back out the same way they got in.

Until now, I’ve been trying to “tough it out.”  The itching is horrible, but I’m the kind of guy who doesn’t seek medical treatment right away.  It’s not a macho thing.  I just put other people’s needs ahead of mine.  “Sure, I’m itching all over and this cream could stop it, but first I need to finish this page for someone and make the kids dinner and a few more things.  Then maybe I’ll break out the itch cream… perhaps.”

Well, today I broke down.  I ran to the pharmacy on my lunch break and bought a tube of anti-itch cream.  I am now in the process of identifying my itchy spots (kind of hard to pinpoint them when there are so many bites) to slather cream on top of.  I apologize in advance for any bad mental images of me slathering cream all over myself.

*itch* *itch* There’s another one. *slather* Ahhhhhh!

That night, I worked a bit on My Upcoming Twitter Application and a blog post.  Every press of the key brought pain and I found I needed to take frequent breaks.  I finally finished and got to bed at about 1:30am, hoping that some sleep would help my elbow feel better.

Sadly, the next day didn’t see any improvement.  And the 5-6 hour drive home (actually longer, but at least 5 hours of actual driving) didn’t help.  Even holding onto and moving the steering wheel hurt.  To make matters worse, the pain is in my left elbow and I’m a leftie.  Can you guess what arm I instinctively use for everything?  Yup, my left one.

Yesterday, I went back to work.  Now, I work as a web programmer.  So my entire job involves typing out code.  Hitting keys on a keyboard.  Exactly the kind of thing that elicits pain from my elbow.  The pain has continued into today.  Every time I think it is getting better, I move a finger or turn my arm and the pain returns.

I’ve had Carpal Tunnel Syndrome before so I know how that feels.  This feels just like that, only in my elbow instead of my wrist.  It turns out that there is a name for this: Cubital Tunnel Syndrome.  I’m going to try to cut down on using my arm as much as possible.  That means you get a short, all-text blog post instead of one chock-full of photos and detailed stories.  For now, you can read about some of our Niagara Falls trip over on B’s blog.  Here’s hoping my elbow gets better quickly.  I need it for my livelihood!

I try to give blood often, but I’ll admit that in recent years I haven’t gone as often as I could.  When I heard that my Temple was running a blood drive, though, I figured I should attend.  So I headed on down, read the now-familiar introductory pamphlets, got the various health-related tests (the iron finger-stick still hurts), answered the now familiar screening questions and then was shown to a cot.

I showed them my blood-giving arm, my right arm with the big vein popping up.  As always, the needle stick didn’t hurt.  It’s more of a quick pinch.  I still can’t watch it be done, though, for fear that I’ll flinch at the worst moment.  The little needle stick was uneventful, though, and soon blood was flowing into a collection bag.

At that point, I asked what was likely an unusual question.  I asked about taking  photos  I explained that I was a blogger and would be blogging about this.  She said I could take photos anywhere except for the questionairre area (due to personal information that is discussed/displayed there) and of the needle itself (as people might be scared off of giving blood if they see a needle close-up photo).  I completely agreed and she took a photo of me giving blood.

As I squeezed a rubber ball, keeping the blood flowing, the collection bag quickly filled.  The needle was carefully removed and a bandage was applied.  Of course, before I left for the snacks area, I had to take a photo of my blood in the collection bag.

Then I was off to the snacks area for the usual assortment of juices and cookies as well as a special treat: cannolis!

All in all, giving blood is mostly painless.  The slight pinching of the needle stick and pain of the finger stick are minor when compared to what you are giving.  The blood you give is separated and given to up to three people.  Yes, three people’s lives might be saved because I took an hour out of my day to give blood.  I’d say that’s an hour well spent.

Although my kids couldn’t come with me, I talked with them a lot about it afterwards.  I showed them my bandage and let them know everything that was done.  I told them that it didn’t hurt much and wasn’t scary.  I emphasised how good it was to save lives and promised that they could come with me to give blood when they are older.  I look forward to the day when I can walk into a blood drive with my two boys and watch as they give blood for the first time.  (NOTE: “Look forward to” doesn’t mean “can’t wait.”  Stay little for as long as possible, NHL & JSL!!!)

If you would like more information about giving blood, you can head on over to the American Red Cross Blood Donation website.  Have you ever given blood?  If so, when was the last time you’ve given?

Disclaimer: The American Red Cross didn’t compensate me for this post in any way.  I did this because I feel that giving blood is important.

On Monday, JSL got sick.  He had been coughing for awhile, but the cough was getting worse.   B took him to the doctor, afraid he had caught my strep throat.  They put him on an antibiotic, but that didn’t seem to help.  That night, he developed a fever and threw up.  The night was very rough with him waking up multiple times coughing so much that he could hardly breathe.  Eventually, he came into our bed.  Needless to say, we didn’t get much sleep and writing a blog post was not a high priority.  Tuesday was busy at work.  By that night, I figured I would just work on my Wednesday blog post and skip Tuesday.

Wednesday night, I should have worked on a blog post, but was too tired.  Thursday saw some heater issues.  (Heat went out. Pilot light wouldn’t stay lit and a professional eventually had to be called when it proved too much for me.)  So, by Thursday night, I decided to write this Friday post instead.

My Aloha Friday question for today is: How far in advance do you write posts for your blog?

Also, make sure you add some spice to your marriage by entering my Eden Fantasys $50 gift card giveaway.  Less than a week to go!

Thanks to Kailani at An Island Life for starting this fun for Friday. Please be sure to head over to her blog to say hello and sign the McLinky there if you are participating.

Aloha #70

For the full story behind this photo, see my post over on DadRevolution.com.

Getting to the office and into the waiting area for the doctor went without incident.  Then the doctor came in.  She was nice, listened to my history and looked in my nose.  She got it to bleed which was a good thing because she seemed to be actively trying to find where it was bleeding from.  Doesn’t make sense to treat areas that you *think* are bleeding when another area might be the actual bleeding spot.  So far all good, but we’re about to head downhill fast.

She said she was going to put some stuff in my nose.  I didn’t quite catch the name, but I thought I heard "Afrin" which I had taken to reduce the size of my nasal blood vessels and so reduce the number and severity of the bleeds.  I figured she was going to pack my nose like was done one time before to help it heal.  As she stuffed a cotton ball up my nose, liquid ran down my lips.

"That’ll just numb your lips a bit," she joked.

Numb?  Excuse me?!!!  Just what was she planning on doing?  I told her that I didn’t want another electrical cauterization done.

"Well, I’m going to have to do something," she said as she walked out of the room.

Now alarm bells were going off.  Just what was "something" and why would she leave the room mid-discussion like that without giving me a chance to respond?  I was left to sit there and think this over (and text message) a bit before she came back in.  I reiterated my stance against another electrical cauterization.  I told her how painful it was last time, how I was so clogged up that I couldn’t sleep last time, and how I had nobody to drive me home should I not feel up to it.  She insisted that she was going to do a silver nitrate cauterization.  She said it’s less intense and I won’t get as clogged up.  I grudgingly accepted, half feeling like I was backed into a corner.

The procedure went smoothly, I guess.  The two main problems during it (for me) came when a flood of fluid spilled from another cotton ball stuffed in my nose into my mouth causing me to swallow numbing solution.  She made sure to squeeze the cotton balls better next time to prevent a recurrence.  The other incident happened when a gush of something came out of my nose and went *under* the bib they put on me right onto my white shirt.  During the electrical cauterization, a similar incident involved blood so I was fearful that my white shirt was now ruined.  Luckily, it was that numbing stuff again which is clear and doesn’t stain.  Still, her joke post-procedure that my white shirt is "too much pressure" for her was in poor taste.

After the procedure was completed, she said she wanted to see me on a weekly basis to keep an eye on the bleeds.  She explained that you can cauterize one area only to have another bleed form slightly higher up in the vessel.  Apparently, she was planning on repeating this procedure many times until the bleeding stopped.

I went to check out and was told I owed a $30 co-pay.  I asked why.  After all, this appointment was a follow-up to my electrical cauterization procedure.  I was informed that followups don’t need co-pays only when dealing with a surgical procedure and electrical cauterization doesn’t count as a surgical procedure.  Then I asked if this meant that my weekly followups would have co-pays as well.  Yes they would was the answer.  This was the last straw.  I can’t afford to spend $30 per week to have someone chase nosebleeds in my nose!

They gave me the number of their billing manager (the person at the desk had no authority to do anything except collect co-pays and schedule appointments) and I called the next day.  The billing manager told me that they had zero leeway with this.  This is what my insurance company mandates so this is what they charge.

Meanwhile, I had had a chance to stew about some of the problems with what went on in the doctor’s office and asked to speak with the patient representative.  I explained to her the situation and she (with my permission) said she’d talk with the doctor.

Now it gets *really fun*.  The doctor called me back and started all but blaming me outright for the situation, telling me that she "can’t read minds."  EXCUSE ME?!!!!  A doctor is not supposed to start a procedure on a patient and just assume they’ll get up to speed about things.  A doctor is supposed to give the patient options and discuss a course of action before starting something.

She said the only other option was packing my nose and I told her that’s what I thought she was doing before I felt the numbing stuff inside my nose.  I quickly realized that I wasn’t getting anywhere with her and got off the phone with her.  B called the patient representative back and lodged a complaint.  Curiously, the doctor didn’t want to see me and the doctor who did my electrical cauterization will now see me on my appointment this Friday.  (If I keep it.)

In any event, this whole situation could have been diffused by five minutes of sitting down with the patient (me) and telling me what our options were and what she thought was needed.  I’d have likely agreed and the rest would have gone the same, but at least I’d have known and agreed to the medical procedure *BEFORE* it was started and not *AFTER* the doctor began it.

Maybe it’s a sign that "Patient Representative" is the first option on their phone menu.

Last month, I went to an ENT specialist concerning my nosebleeds. I was getting them on a daily basis and they were really troubling me. Now when I say nosebleeds, I don’t mean a bit of blood coming out of my nose, I mean a gush of blood necessitating constant pressure for 10-15 minutes. The nosebleeds always came from the same nostril, the left one. Yes, the same one that I can hardly breathe through.

Last month, the ENT packed my nose with special gauze to help my nostril’s blood vessels heal. This worked for a week or two. Then I got a nosebleed. The next week, I got another one. Then they started coming every 2 or 3 days.

Meanwhile, last week, JSL had strep. When I developed a sore throat (and heard that a few of my co-workers had sore throats), I wondered if I was getting strep as well. So I went back to the ENT, figuring I’d find out about the strep at the same time that I talk with them about my nose. They didn’t think I had strep, but did a culture just to be sure. (Results will take a few days.) Then it was time for my nose.

The nurse practitioner took a look in my nose and said that it was time to go for electrical-cauterization. They got their tools ready and here’s the intrument of torture:

First, they soaked a cotton ball with some numbing solution. They shoved this up my nostril, causing numbing stuff to run down my lip and into my mouth. YUCK! After it had a few minutes to work, and after B took JSL out of the room, they began the cauterization. Think of the static electric shock you get from time to time when you touch a light switch. Multiply that by 10. Now put that shock inside your nostril. Yes, it was painful. Very painful. And, even worse, I could smell my nostril burning. (This burning smell would persist for hours afterwards.)

As a side effect of this procedure, I can’t breathe through either nostril now. (Not going to go into any more details since I think I’ve already strayed into TMI territory.) Last night was spent passed out for an hour, then up for an hour hacking and coughing and trying to, somehow, get comfortable enough to sleep.

I know that, in the long run, this will help me avoid nosebleeds. It was also a prerequisite for even considering any form of surgery on my nose to correct my breathing problems. Still, in the short term, it was quite the nasty procedure. I’m hoping to be able to rest a bit more today so I can go back to work tomorrow. (Not to mention being able to breathe a bit better.)

Yesterday, Shellie Ross of Florida (aka military_mom) found her 2 year old son in the pool. Unfortunately, he didn’t make it. Earlier this year, I posted about the four scariest moments of my life. They all involved medical emergencies with NHL or JSL. In three of them, I seriously thought I was losing my child. In those moments, I got the barest glimpse into how Shellie must feel now. Not a full understanding, mind you, but a general idea. And let me tell you, that barest glimpse will haunt me for the rest of my life. A “full understanding” has got to be a million times worse. Considering the mere possibility makes me want to grab my boys, squeeze them tight and never let them go. My condolences go out to Shellie and her family.

Most people reacted, like I did, with shock, sadness and condolences. A vocal few, however, expressed skepticism that the event happened at all. They claimed to have contacted hospitals/news media and didn’t come up with anything. Therefore, these people claimed, the event didn’t happen at all and Shellie was running some kind of hoax. There were even allusions to balloon boy.

Now since those criticisms happened, news reports have begun to emerge indicating that Shellie wasn’t lying and her child really is dead. Ignoring those for a second (backing up to before she was vindicated against her critics), could the whole thing have been a hoax? Yes, it was within the realm of possibility. It is easier to fake certain things when you are online. As the old saying goes, “On the Internet, nobody knows that you’re a dog.“

However, there’s something to be said for trust and basic human compassion too. If she was faking, what would we have lost by trusting in her and showing her compassion? We would have felt naive for a bit and then gone on with our lives. But if she was telling the truth (which she was) and we lambasted her for “faking it” when her son really had died? Then we would have been heartless idiots who had found a way to make the worst thing a parent can ever experience even worse.

I’ll risk being naive over heartless any day. I would rather err on the side of compassion and “innocent until proven guilty.” No, it doesn’t mean blindly accepting anything I’m told, but it does mean knowing when to use tact in your replies and recognizing that your words could hurt someone if you are wrong. These critics didn’t have any tact and saw nothing wrong in trampling over Shellie just to prove that they were right (which they weren’t). That wasn’t skepticism, that was just being mean.

Now, I think I’ll put on my own skepticism hat to debunk two of the critics’s stories. One person claimed that, at the time her son fell into the pool, Shellie was twittering about her chickens. Another insinuated that she twittered instead of helping her son or Twittered immediately afterward (as if her first reaction to seeing her son in the pool was “gotta tweet this”). Let’s look into these. The news story gives the incident time as 5:38pm. Using the Twitter API (and not the “posted 20 hours ago” message that Twitter.com gives you), we can see that her “fog scared the birds” tweet happened at “Mon Dec 14 22:22:19 +0000 2009.” Translated to Eastern Time (-5 GMT), that’s 5:22pm. Yes, this is somewhat close to when it happened, but a 16 minute span is far from tweeting about chickens while her son was falling into the pool.

As for the “tweeting during the incident” claims, her “my 2 yr old fell in the pool” post happened at “Mon Dec 14 23:12:53 +0000 2009″, or 6:12pm Eastern. This is 34 minutes after the incident. A half hour after the incident is certainly not Twittering during it. As someone who has had a child go to the ER (too many times), I know the general timeline. At 34 minutes after the event, she would have been in the hospital. They would have likely separated her son from her son while they tried to revive him. (A distraught mother isn’t very helpful and can get in the way unintentionally.) She was likely alone at the time (her husband’s deployed and they just moved to the area) and made a quick outreach to a support network, Twitter in this case.

So, in short, the critics criticized her for things she didn’t do and jumped to conclusions. These weren’t the actions of skeptics looking for proof. If they had really been seeking proof, they would have waited a day or two before pointing to the lack of news media reports. (After all, the news media isn’t the quickest to report things.) If all they sought was proof, then the news article would have been enough. Now, though, they question the timeline and her priorities. Instead of simply seeking the truth, these people really just refuse to admit that they were in the wrong. Instead of admitting their missteps, they move the goalposts and claim to only want to know the whole story. Meanwhile, Shellie is made to suffer their barbs on top of her already tremendous loss.

My heart and condolences go out to Shellie. For the critics, my sincere hope is that they learn how to apologize, when keep quiet and how to be tactful.

After picking up NHL, B told me that he was complaining of having a headache.  That sparked a memory of him complaining of having a headache this morning.  That, combined with B not being sure if he had a fever and the obvious rampant infection rate in his school, leads us to worry about NHL having H1N1.  B, JSL and NHL are off as I type this to get NHL some Tamiflu to have onhand in case he really has influenza.  Meanwhile, I’m going to keep my fingers crossed that he’s just feeling tired and run down and not H1N1-sick.

In related news, I checked out the CDC’s FluView website.  The map intrigued me and I wanted to see how H1N1 has been progressing.  I managed to locate all of the archival maps (except for week 16) and strung them into a Flash animation:

Note how the brown "widespread" states multiply starting the first week of September, aka When School Starts.  I have a bad feeling that NHL’s school in particular and schools in general are going to see worse infection rates before things improve.

Here’s hoping that everyone out there stays healthy!