Evolution of a Parody Song or Little Cookie of Fur?

My boys haven’t been allowed to watch The Big Bang Theory of yet. While there’s a lot in the show that we could geek out over together, there’s just too much (e.g. sex talk) that is inappropriate for them.  Still, we’ve introduced them to some elements of the show such as the Soft Kitty song.

If you’ve never seen Big Bang Theory, the Soft Kitty song is the tune that Sheldon Cooper’s mother sings to him when he gets sick.

While in the kitchen the other day, I began – just out of the blue – singing "Soft cookie, warm cookie."  That’s when JSL chimed in.  Unfortunately, he completed the line with the line "Little Cookie of Fur."  Suddenly, there was much laughter – mostly from me as I envisioned a furry cookie.  (Furry cookies don’t seem appetizing to me at all!)

After a moment of thought, I continued my verse with "ball of cookie dough.  Chewy cookie, chocolate cookie…" And that’s where I was stuck.  I couldn’t think of a rhyme for dough that would work.

Not to be deterred, I kept at it as I worked in the kitchen.  Finally, I came up with:

Soft cookie
Warm cookie
Cookie dough rolled up
Chewy cookie
Chocolate cookie
Eat them up!

This sounded really good… except the repeated "up" nagged at me.  It always strikes me as cheap when a singer rhymes a word with itself.  Call it nitpicking, but an entire song can be ruined for me because the lyrics include self-rhyming.  After some more thought, I sang:

Soft cookie
Warm cookie
Get them in my tum
Chewy cookie
Chocolate cookie
Yum! Yum! Yum!

This was better, but now the "tum" line bothered me.  Still, it was pretty good so I decided to leave it be.

A short while later, I went upstairs to hook up a new printer (one my in-laws weren’t using anymore).  While cleaning up some space for it, I came upon some old finds: VHS tapes, old Free Comic Book Day comics, and a rhyming dictionary.  I wondered if this would have a good word so JSL (who had come to keep me company/play) and I looked up "yum."  I could have slapped myself.  How could I forget the word "crumb"?!!!  That both rhymed and fit the cookie theme.  So here is the full Soft Cookie song:

Soft cookie
Warm cookie
Little cookie crumb
Chewy cookie
Chocolate cookie
Yum! Yum! Yum!

Of course, I had to have a little graphics fun as well to come up with this:

Soft Cookie Web

Do You Wanna Play Some Munchkin? (A Tabletop Parody of Disney’s Frozen)

Singing_Dancing_Sword_Winter A couple of weeks ago, inspiration hit.  I had been playing Munchkin with NHL quite a bit and heard yet another Frozen parody song.  Suddenly, words were flowing into my brain.  I quickly jotted them down knowing that, if I didn’t, they would disappear forever.  Those words were followed by more and more until an entire song was formed.  I had turned "Do You Wanna Build A Snowman" into "Do You Wanna Play Some Munchkin".

I wasn’t finished, though.  As I read through the lyrics with NHL and JSL, I could tell they loved the song.  However, there were a few weak points where I just didn’t like the flow.  NHL helped me tweak parts of it to make it even better.  I fully credit the "Snails on Speed" section to NHL.

Eventually, we were happy with the song.  I found a karaoke version of Do You Wanna Build A Snowman and let it play as I sung the words.  The boys were hooked.  Even now, NHL will break into song at random points and has memorized most of the lyrics.

I had planned on revealing this with a video showcasing NHL and I singing this, but we haven’t made it yet and I just can’t hold this back any longer.  I still plan on making a video, but for now, you can just sing along at home.

Enough introductions, though.  Let’s kick down this door and play… I mean sing some Munchkin!


Do You Wanna Play Some Munchkin?
(Sung to the tune of Do You Wanna Build A Snowman from Disney’s Frozen)

Do you wanna play some Munchkin?
I’ve got the cards. Let’s play!
Snails on Speed are behind the door
They’re a level four
Minus two to run away!

I’ve got the Slimy Armor
Wishing Ring too
And Cloak Of Obscurity!

Do you wanna play some Munchkin?
You can be the biggest Munchkin…

{Go away}

Okay, bye…

Do you wanna boil an anthill?
Or maybe bribe GM with food?
We could fight against a Pukachu
Or beat some Harpies too
That Net Troll’s pretty rude!

(Yes! Rolled a five.)

I hope that the Wight Brothers
Aren’t behind this door
‘Cause I’m just a level three…
(kick-kick kick-kick kick-Boom! ARGH!)

Please, I need your help now.
It’s a Plutonium Dragon
My Singing and Dancing Sword won’t do
Sleep Potion’s just plus two
Won’t you jump in?

Please use your Staff of Napalm
And then you can pick
Of treasures, the first two!

Do you wanna play some Munchkin?


NOTE: The "Singing Dancing Sword" card is a photo I took (and then enhanced) of a Munchkin card.  Thanks go to Steve Jackson Games and John Kovalic for such a wonderful game.  Also to Disney for the amazing movie that is Frozen.  Finally, to Wil Wheaton for his Tabletop program which helped me hook NHL on Munchkin in the first place!

Setting Our Kids Up To Fail – ‘Another Brick In The Wall’ Parody

man_with_microphone_smallI usually don’t post on a Tuesday, but this idea was too good to hold onto.  Awhile back, I was listening to Pandora and the Pink Floyd song "Another Brick In The Wall, Part 2" came on.  As I listened, I realized this could be perfectly adapted to the current school situation.  After the recent events with Commissioner John King, it just made even more sense.  If you need a reminder of what the lyrics really are, check them out here or watch Pink Floyd sing the song.

One last thing.  I’d video myself singing this except: 1) I’m not the best singer around and 2) I’m currently battling something and am losing my voice.  Feel free to video yourself singing these lyrics and post them online.  Let me know if you do and I’ll link to them.

Without further ado, here is "Setting Our Kids Up To Fail", an "Another Brick In The Wall" parody:

We don’t need to test ad nauseam.
We don’t need no Common Core.
No high stakes testing in the classroom
Pearson leave our kids alone
Hey! Pearson! Leave our kids alone!
All in all it’s just setting our kids up to fail.
All in all you’re just setting our kids up to fail.

We don’t need only test teaching
We don’t need more Scantron forms
No death penalty for public schools
John King leave our kids alone
Hey! John King! Leave our kids alone!
All in all it’s just setting our kids up to fail.
All in all it’s just setting our kids up to fail.

"Wrong, You fail the test!"
"If you don’t take the test, we don’t know if you’re learning. How can we know if you’re learning if you don’t take the test?"
"You! Yes, you teacher. Stop teaching creatively!"

Here’s hoping Pearson, NYSED, and Commissioner John King leave our kids alone soon.

NOTE: The "man with microphone" image above is by laobc and is available from OpenClipArt.com.

Saying Goodbye To 2015

goodbye-2015This past year has been an eventful one.  For better or for worse, it is coming to an end.  Our New Year’s Eve tradition is to have a "Junk Food Dinner" (mostly hors d’oeuvres) and stay up until the ball drops.  My tradition on this blog is to look back at some of my favorite posts of the year.


Unfortunately, I rang in the New Year with a resurgence of my post-surgery anxiety attacks.  I realized that Anxiety Is A Bully.  It tries to dictate the rules of engagement to you so that they vastly favor the anxiety and not you.  It’s important to fight back, realize what anxiety is doing, and refuse to play by its rules.

On a more serious front, the Charlie Hebdo attack led me to wonder about the Freedom To Offend and the Freedom To Be Offended.  While it might seem tempting to silence people from saying offensive things, we’ve got to protect their right to offend.  If we don’t, then someone else might take offense to something we think is important and silence us.  At the same time, people have a right to be offended and to call for there to be consequences.  If a politician says something extremely offensive to me, then it’s my right to protest and demand he be removed from office.  This doesn’t mean silencing him.  It just means balancing two different, yet related rights.  It can be tricky to navigate these waters without going too far in either direction, but it’s important that we don’t let ourselves sway too far against the offensive or against those who are offended.

Did you know I have a Zazzle store?  I didn’t.  I posted a parody of "Soft Kitty" from Big Bang Theory and then inspiration struck and I turned it into a T-Shirt.  I’m not sure if any have actually sold, but I love coming up with things like this.


I began February with an Extreme Geekery.  I looked into the Archimedes quote "Give me a lever long enough and I shall move the world."  Spoiler alert:  This would work, but the lever’s going to be really, really, REALLY long!  (I also had fun adding draws to my post.  I don’t do that enough.)

With a measles epidemic raging, I dove into the subject of vaccines and consequences.  My takeaway: Vaccines work.  Those who claim they cause autism or contain toxins or are worse than the diseases they prevent are ignorant at best or trying to sell you bunk at worst.  Unless you have a medical condition that precludes vaccination (e.g. some allergies or an immune system disorder), everyone should be vaccinated.  It’s a simple procedure that will save the lives of not just the vaccinated but of the people who can’t be due to age or medical issues.

We spent much of last year playing Minecraft.  I’ll admit that I haven’t picked it up much recently, but there have been many updates that my boys have shown me and I might just need to try them out myself.


March began with a monumental event.  We cancelled cable.  Without cable, we joined the ever growing ranks of cord cutters and got our video entertainment from a mixture of Internet-based video services (Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hulu), renting DVDs from our local library, and an OTA antenna.  I also have some new equipment that I need to set up which will let me record shows and stream videos to our TV.  We’ve been saving money every month and haven’t looked back.

We had a touching moment in a local museum.  They had an electronic drum set and NHL – who plays percussion in his band – was rocking out to it.  A set of headphones he wore kept the sound to himself.  A little girl came up to watch him play and NHL offered her his headphones.  The little girl was instantly mesmerized by the sounds NHL was producing.  Her eyes glazed over as her full attention was given to what her ears were hearing.  Then NHL gave her the drumsticks and helped show her how to make the sounds.  He willingly gave up a spot at one of his favorite exhibits so that a little girl he didn’t know could discover the wonders of drumming.  It’s a little gesture, but I was so proud of him at that moment.


During April, we got into some tabletop gaming with Pandemic.  We were introduced to it by a family member during Passover and had to get it ourselves.  What I love about Pandemic is that everyone works together.  There is no one winner or loser.  Either everyone wins by curing the diseases or everyone loses as the diseases ravage the world.

There was also a big WordPress vulnerability found and as people rushed to update I explained just what the vulnerability meant and how web developers usually tackle this sort of thing.


May was a very geeky month.  Along with Free Comic Book Day, and palindrome week, Star Wars Day meant we could play some lightsaber games.  May also saw JSL turning 8.  To wrap up the geekery, California instituting "toilet to tap" led me to wonder just how much water was in the world to drink.  It turns out that it’s a lot, but it isn’t an infinite resource.

I also wrote about Asperger’s Syndrome and how it affects neurotypical siblings.  JSL can be very patient with his brother at times, but he does have his limits and will often crave non-NHL times.


In June, I took some lessons from a rose bush – don’t listen to others telling you that you can’t succeed, just do your best and keep at it.

I also wrecked havoc with society by inventing instant transportation.  Ok, I just wrote about what would happen to society if someone invented it.  Given how I think it would turn out,  be thankful it’s not here.

Unfortunately, we had a crazy week when B’s mother had a heart attack and ended up in the hospital.  She’s feeling better now, but it was scary (especially for the boys who were right there when it happened).  To add insult to injury, it happened on her birthday which also happened to be the day she retired.  Everyone should know the real life symptoms of heart attacks.  (That last link isn’t one of my blog posts, but it’s important enough to bring up as often as possible.)

Thanks to then-newly-running candidate Donald Trump, I explored the true cost of web development.  Unfortunately for Trump, you can’t develop a large, complex web application that will be used nation-wide and only pay $3.  It simply cannot be done.


In July, New Horizons’ impending rendezvous with Pluto made me geek out about how quickly we’d be able to travel around the Earth if we could move at the speeds New Horizons was travelling at.

A tweet from The Bloggess inspired me to gather a series of 18 things that I’d tell 18 year old me.

Finally, it’s amazing how much you can get attached to a piece of furniture.  We finally got rid of our old couch.  It was hard to do, but it also was time.  The boys got to sit on it one last time as it lay on the curb awaiting pickup.  I even let them jump on it – something we never let them do when it was in our living room.


In August, I turned 40 years old.  Or, as I like to think of it, the 11th anniversary of my 29th birthday.  In addition, NHL turned 12.  Why won’t he stop growing up?  Why?!!!

We also began a cruising adventure to celebrate my 40th birthday.


In September, I shared a washy washy, happy happy, smiley smiley cruise greeting and described our incredible beach day at Norwegian’s private island.

This was also the month of me speed reading.  NHL was reading the Percy Jackson series so I decided to read them as well.  (I’ve always been a fan of Greek mythology.)  I not only tore through the first book, but the entire series (passing where NHL was).  Since then, I’ve finished Rick Riordan’s Heroes of Olympus series, his Cain trilogy, and the first book in his Asgard series.  I’ve only stopped because I’ve run out of books by him.  (Come on, Rick, get book 2 written quickly!)  I’ve also read The Bloggess’ Furiously Happy and laughed the whole way through.


In October, I wrote a rebuttal to someone who claimed that kids with Autism are better off when they’re bullied.  The author actually used the word "perks" to describe the results of bullying.  I’d use words like tormenting, paranoia, isolation, loneliness, and hopelessness instead to describe what happens when someone is bullied.  If you want to call those "perks" then you have a really warped definition of the word perks.

On the video gaming front, I fulfilled a lifelong desire to make Mario video games thanks to Super Mario Maker.

After picking 44.5 pounds of apples, I baked apple dishes until we were sick of apples.

Finally, I wrote up a guide to help people who wanted to explore cutting cable.


In November, I went through some scary Halloween decorations and an even scarier Christmas one.

I also gave a peek at what goes on in my head when I try to communicate verbally.  It’s battle on many fronts and not one I win every time.


December saw our Star Wars excitement build to critical mass.  Spoiler free review:  The Force Awakens was incredible.  I can’t wait to see it again.

We also celebrated B’s birthday and I had a mini-mid life crisis thanks to my Imposter Syndrome.

Finally, we had some fun with Google Cardboard.


It’s been a wonderful year.  Here’s hoping that 2016 will be exciting in all the right ways.

NOTE: The "Goodbye 2015" image above is based on "Fireworks Remix" by keriann3 which is available from OpenClipArt.org.

Unfocused Mind

wandering-brainRight now, my mind should be focused on a blog post topic.

Perhaps, I should write about how tonight is the first day of Passover.  Maybe I could mention how tired I am from all the cleaning involved and how I’m not looking forward to eating matzoh for eight days.

Or else I could write about how this is Autism Awareness Month.  I could link to a bunch of my past posts about Autism, describe some newer experiences, and possibly even give my take on the "light it up blue" controversy.

If I wanted to get into local politics, I definitely would have a few choice words concerning the approval of the New York State budget and how this is going to hurt teachers and students.  I might get a bit heated when I mentioned all the politicians who voted for it "with a heavy heart" – even as they said it was horrible – for the sole reason of party politics.

All of these would be good topics and I’ll likely write about these at some point.

Right now, though, my mind is a blank when it comes to blog posting.  I sit down, see the blank screen, and no words come to mind.

Well, that’s not entirely true.  My mind is coming up with a lot of words for a song parody.  The problem is, I wanted to write a blog entry to post now and this parody won’t be ready in time.  I’ve written song parodies before and even attempted singing one once.  I don’t think I’ll be going on American Idol, The Voice, or any of those other singing reality shows anytime soon.  One day, I really need to find someone who is good at singing and video production to turn one of my parodies into an actual music video.  If you know anyone who is interested, please let me know.

Until then, I’ll be here letting my mind wander where it wants to go.  After all, I get some of my best ideas when my mind roams.

NOTE: The image above is a combination of "walking" by sixsixfive and "brain" by trubinial guru.  Both images are available via OpenClipArt.org.

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